Serial Trainer











{December 22, 2010}   Ch’Arms…? Seriously!?

So..Ch’arms. I sat down one morning and heard Rod Ryan of the Buzz (94.5 in Houston) and he was ranting about these things. I couldn’t help but go and look into this. They are Spanx..for your arms. I’m *almost* speechless.

Almost.

But that would be like asking me not to breathe..and well..that’s not gonna happen anytime soon!

If you have 29.99 to buy Ch’arms, you have dues for a health club membership or a payment on some kind of exercise equipment. It will certainly buy you a kettle ball or fitness ball. And guess what? Push ups are free, ladies.

Have we seriously entered into the realm of DENIAL? Stuffing yourself into spanx and ch’arms like a sausage is nearly ridiculous. Now, ladies, we’ve all bought “control top” pantyhose..what happens?  Everything gets held in there and ….drumroll….gets muffin topped elsewhere. Honestly, what is the point!? Body Spanx?

Stop.
Just….stop.

Accept that you’re beautiful. You’re real. You’re working on issues, don’t try to hide them in stretchy body trampolines. At least carry some scissors in case your blood stops flowing.

Advertisements



I stopped picking up a lot of the fitness magazines that I used to love. Let me tell you why:

My first reason is that they are cutting back on the quality of information and recycling it in future issues. I remember picking up a magazine that I won’t name (not so much into slander these days, sorry) and seeing beautiful depicted anatomy pictures. You have to know what you’re working on in order to know what you’re doing, folks. I don’t expect you to know all the “big names” of muscles but it’s nice to physically see how that anatomy works.

Is it just me or are people too trusting these days? Let me get on a little soap box about this before I continue ..

You go to a health club. You decide you need some help..you ask for a personal trainer. You walk in for your first session and your personal trainer shows up and is maybe 19. Maybe. Male or female, they have a great body. Pause.

How many 19 year olds DON’T have a great body??  Ask them what THEY ate for lunch and it’ll probably be something like “Subway 6 inch sub with chips and a diet coke” or..even worse…”Pizza”. Now ..before panties get in a bunch, this is not the BIBLE of scenarios but this is typical. I’m 37 years old. If I eat a subway sandwhich with chips and a coke everyday for lunch, I’m gaining at least 5lbs by the end of the week.

Let’s also point out that they work in a health club. They train people all day. That’s moving around, demonstrating exercises and running back and forth between protein bars. It’s the same concept as The Biggest Loser. Those people spend their day being active in a controlled environment with cooked meals. It’s an amazing transformation and they work VERY hard, but the average person doesn’t achieve those kinds of results for a reason. Note that you shouldn’t be discouraged by this NOR should you use it as an excuse. It’s just a reality check.

Now back to my beef :

I understand that in order to stay in business, there has to be advertisers. But when I’m paying $4 for a magazine, I don’t want to have more than half of it be advertising …and most of all, for things that aren’t related to health! There has to be a better idea than posting 12 full page advertising ads in between “Building better abs” and “Gorgeous Glutes”.

I don’t care what the latest sexual stimulant is. I don’t care about Bat-dung based supplements. I want to see REAL people, in real fitness gear, in real life situations coming out on top. I’m tired of seeing celebrities who have money for the luxuries of 5 day a week personal trainers, on call chefs, swimming pools in their bedrooms and liposuction on “bad months” when they couldn’t do it themselves. I want to see real struggles. Fall on your face for us, but get the hell back up and show us we can too.

And for the love of all things holy, stop putting the “Increase Breast Size Cream” ads in your magazine!!



{December 22, 2010}   Zombie apocalypse

What!? It could happen..right?

And if it did would you be in shape? Think about all that walking and running and bat swinging. Think about the stairs you’d have to climb to get to the top floor. And what about having no sleep or food to fuel you.

This is your zombie survival guide.

Rule 1. No matter how slow the zombie is he’ll always be right behind you. So set that treadmill for moderate intensity and settle in for the long hall. Oh yeah ..and don’t look back.

Rule 2. If you’re fit you’re lean cut steak..don’t think you’re exempt from the zombie palate.

Rule 3. Zombies travel in large packs seemingly always catching you when you’re away or alone..remember that when your workout partner ditches you..you must be prepared to go at it alone.

Rule 4. Zombies don’t care if its Monday and national chest day..if you can’t swing a club or bat repeatedly for 20 min you will probably die.

Rule 5. If you are what you eat…zombies like chips and McDonald’s ..just saying..

More on the zombie apocalypse later…its time to hit the treadmill




J: Your torture methods are effective. If I stay still the pain sets in. If I keep moving it’s bearable but moving hurts. You should work for Black Ops or something.

Me: rofl!!!!!!!

J: I need a butt donut. oi.

I love you girlfriend! LOL



{November 22, 2010}   Monday Challenge

Most people start off their Monday’s doing the “Chest Workout”. If you look on my site, it’s probably the most popular post I have on this blog. My challenge today is to break out of the routine. Our bodies are amazing and can adapt to nearly any condition, routine, workout that you give it. Variety is the key to breaking boundaries. Whether it be to get over a plateau or to just bust out of the monotony.

Who’s up for the challenge? Post here and let me know what you did today to boycott National Chest Day!



{November 18, 2010}   FREE STUFF

I’ve decided that I’m going to get this blog going again with a bang!

So what does that mean for you? FREE STUFF.

Random posters/commentors/questioners will get something free from me. It could be something as small as a water bottle or something bigger like free supplements. Maybe a T-Shirt. You get the idea. So post away!

If there are any sponsors that would like to get in on this, please contact me at serialtrainer@gmail.com



{November 17, 2010}   Put away the Winter Bulk!

Here I am again! This year has gone by so quickly but it’s been full of events. In addition to my years as a trainer, I’ve expanded my resume a bit and tried a new line of work. Why am I telling you this? Because I think it’s important that you relate to your trainer, even if they are online. How many of you have looked at your trainer, or overheard them talk about how they’ve never been overweight?

Even though that is not always the case, it’s frustrating to those of us that have jobs that don’t allow us to move around all day or have free gym memberships. It’s increasingly frustrated, if on top of that, we’ve always struggled with a weight problem.

Some of our weight problems can be due to illness but it’s up to us to take responsibility where it’s due. Sometimes..it’s because we want to eat a Big Mac instead of a salad with grilled chicken. Sometimes, it’s because we want a chocolate milk shake from Burger King instead of a protein meal replacement shake.

Without dragging it out further, I’m going to give you insight to my year in hopes that it will inspire you and encourage you to never give up your goals.

As I previously mentioned, I changed my line of work. I started June of 2009 as a Leasing Consultant. I love this job. However, it does have it’s challenges. It can be very stressful and there’s not a lot of “labor” involved other than walking. Thank goodness for that because if I had to sit at a desk like some of you are forced to do, I don’t know what I’d do with myself. I really feel for anyone that has to be chained in their seat and I can see how that puts more challenge into your weight loss/fitness plans.

In addition to that, I’ve been doing promoting and bookings in my area. So I work 9-6, get off work, go to my Martial Arts class, go to my “night job” come home, spend a few minutes with the spawnlings, then collapse into bed. I feel like a Gerbil in a Ball on some days. My sleeping had become sporatic and I was looking as tired as I felt.

On top of the job change, I also ran into some health issues. Normally, I wouldn’t be so personal but that’s what this blog is all about; Making me a real person to you.

I found out that I had severe endometriosis..again. On top of that, I had what they call a “frozen pelvis”. Scary name huh? I thought so. I was in a great deal of pain and I wasn’t sure what was going on, so I continued to go to my gynecologist for these arcane, medieval type tests and was getting nowhere with them. I decided to get a second opinion and was advised that maybe it was time to just tie my tubes or explore what was going on through a laparoscopy. Thank goodness I opted for that. Upon starting the procedure, my doctor told me he couldn’t even get in there! He told me that if there was anything wrong, I may have to have a complete hysterectomy before the surgery, so it was something I was prepared for. I’m 37 and have four boys..I’m not opposed to the idea of being unable to have anymore!

To make a long story short, my doctor told me that it was the worst thing he’s seen in 20 years of practice and that he was surprised I could even function. I had the hysterectomy done with the mental preparation that I may in fact gain weight..weight that took me so long to lose. The first time that I had the endometriosis, I climed the scale to 180lbs. I’m 5’3 so I looked about twice that weight.

I’m happy to say that through the stress of my job (we had 1/2 the staff we normally have so I was working double hours with double work) and the surgery, I’m very happy with the results. I’m happier. I’m more active. I’m no longer in pain. And I feel like a million dollars.

I’m down to about 130-132 lbs. Still some work to go, but it’s been much easier since my surgery. Being bed-ridden for 6 weeks was the hardest thing I’ve had to do. I’ve never been sedentary to that degree. Gaining the stamina back was rough but my body remembered soon enough.

The point in all this is that you have to stand back up every time you fall off the horse. Everytime. Do not let it get you down. Learn why you fell, fix it, forgive yourself and move on. It’s okay to stumble, but if you stay down, it’s called defeat. You have to fight for what you want. It sounds cheesy and cliche but it’s the truth. Cue the Rocky Music and get your butt motivated.

In other good news: I’ve started training live people again! 😀 Hopefully, they will let me post some before and after pics as well as results. I will be sure to post them if I get their permission! Keep your eyes peeled and remember that all it takes is an email to get some help from me, online…or post your comments/questions to the blog! Chances are..if you have a question, someone else has been wondering the same thing!



{April 6, 2010}   P90X

A lot of people have asked me about this workout. In theory, this workout is pretty close to what a trainer would have you do, except that a trainer will hone in on your weaknesses (like posture deviations) and tailor a workout for you designed to be more personal.

HOWEVER…(there’s always a BIG BUTT in my posts, I swear)..

In order to give you a more personal opinion of it — drumroll please — I’m going to take the P90X Challenge!

I can tell you that I did the CardioX challenge last night and it was great!  I think he could’ve done a few more exercise examples for beginners or let them know what to do if they get fatigued or need to modify the exercise. I will keep everyone updated as I go!




As we all know, the summer is fast approaching. It’s still a little chilly here and there but overall, the weather is warming up and layers of clothing are dwindling. It’s time for us to get into the mindset of [cue horror music] bathing suits!

Some of you are new to working out and so I’ve dedicated this post to you. Those of us that are more experienced might even find this a refreshing way to start a new season and add something new to our workouts. OR it’s a great way to re-assess your fitness level and make needed changes. Sometimes it’s good to start over. If you have access to a health club, most trainers will do a physical assessment on you for no charge. Knowing your posture deviations is important to enhancing and improving your overall health but it doesn’t stop there. Once you’ve corrected those, you might develop new ones. I know..it’s a never-ending gerbil ball, right? But that’s OK! It’s good to change things up and to continue improving. It gives us a sense of accomplishment and motivation.

Alright so let’s get down to business.

The first thing you need to do is CHECK WITH YOUR PHYSICIAN.

Did I make that clear enough? Let me repeat it: The first thing you need to do is CHECK WITH YOUR PHYSICIAN.

I stress this for a few reasons. Many people have injured themselves and put themselves in major harm’s way because they had a condition they never knew they had. If you have diabetes or other heart related conditions you will not be able, nor advised to do the same exercise/intensity as the general populace. This is NOT a bad thing. If you push yourself beyond what you SHOULD be doing, you are also HINDERING your progress and health. NOT worth it, folks. Really, it’s not.

If your doctor gives you the all clear, the next thing you need to do is find out your resting heart rate. The best time to do this is in the morning when you first wake up, or after being sedentary for a long period of time and do not have any stimulants in your system (ie; caffeine). Find your pulse at your wrist or neck and count out the beats per minute for one full minute. If possible, do this more than once and take the average.

How to find your target heart rate:
220 – your age
subtract your resting heart rate (this is called your heart rate reserve)

Now give yourself a range, or a set of numbers, to keep your heart rate at so that you don’t go nuts trying to keep it at one number. For novices, start by multiplying that heart rate reserve number by 50-60%. This will give you about 10 numbers to work with. For intermediate you’d use about 70-80%.

You can play with those numbers a little (example: 55-65%) to find a comfortable zone for you.

Here’s a tip for you: To use primarily absolute fat, keep your intensity low. To burn more calories, keep your intensity higher.

You always want to add in some muscle building exercise to all your workouts. Losing weight and burning calories can result in a “saggy” look if you do not build that muscle underneath, PLUS, you definitely want to keep burning calories while you’re lying around doing nothing..right?  It’s like having a free fat-burning session — hello!? — who wouldn’t take that!? 😉



{February 26, 2010}   Rezzing the Dead

SO…yeah you guessed it. Life got crazy and I was away for a bit. However, I am not dead..I know I keep saying that but rest assured I am healthy and alive.

One of the things I really wanted to post on here was a little issue we all need to address and it pertains to myself as well so it makes it easy to talk about: Stress.

Stress is a killer. I don’t care how well you eat, how much you work out. If you’re under a lot of stress and don’t take time to decompress, you will only be skating uphill..which means you go nowhere. You can actually be un-doing all the work that you have been putting effort toward. Stress raises cortisol levels, blood pressure and all kinds of other nasty things that can throw your entire body for a loop and most of all, do damage to your heart.

Workouts can help you destress but I emphasize that you need to find some outlet that allows your body to completely relax. Taking 10-20 min’s to yourself is imperative. When you live under stressful conditions, even your sleep is affected. Make sure you’re getting 8-10 hours of sleep. If you wake up still tired, you probably need more.

One of the things that has really helped me is a casual walk just before bed, or even a yoga class. Stretching and focusing your breathing is an excellent way to regenerate your body. So find your center and RELAX! 🙂



et cetera